Wedding customs

Marriage Rituals: The groom's first choice would be to tie the marital knot with his sister's or maternal uncle's daughter. Or else, once an alliance is fixed an engagement is fixed at the bride's house. At this Nichadartham or engagement ceremony, an engagement agreement is drawn up by the pujari and given to the two families. The next custom followed by this community in the run-up to the marriage is that the groom's family will contribute some gold for the making of the bride's sacred "thali" or mangalsutra. Meanwhile, the pujari will pick an auspicious date for the wedding.

Marriage Pandal: There are many rituals to be observed while building the marriage pandal or the flowered canopy under which the wedding ceremony is performed. A bunch of mango leaves is tied atop a bamboo stick covered with turmeric paste and red earth. Ghee and coral stone is placed inside a hole, which is dug, and milk is poured on top of the bamboo stick. The stick is fixed into the hole even as cups filled with sprouted gram are placed in front of the pole and allowed to germinate. They have a ceremony to inform the elders about the marriage with the couple seated on palm leaves.

Registration of the marriage: The parents of both families register the marriage details in their respective family temples three days before the marriage. There are a number of rituals, which have to be observed before the actual wedding. They are the:

Padaipu or ancestor worship in which food is cooked and offered to the ancestor and then eaten by the family.

Manai Poduthal: Construction of the brick platform in which married women with the help of a mason will seat the couple during the wedding

Arasanikkal: The bamboo stick which was decorated earlier is tied in front of the marriage platform

Hanging and lighting a lamp: A lamp is hung and lit next to the bamboo stick

Mattru Kattuthal: The protective cloth covering is made for the marriage platform as the homes are decorated with kolam

Groom's family receives the sacred thali, and the garlands from the temple are handed to the bride's family

Minji: The groom's maternal uncle adorns the nephew's feet with toe-rings and gold pendants are strung together for the groom's auspicious necklace. The bride is also adorned with jewellery from her relatives

Pooram Kazhithal or the virgin bath: the bride is bathed and adorned with golden chains.

Thumbu Pidithal: The presence of the deities is invoked through kolam decorations

Azhagu Arati: The groom is bid farewell by his paternal grandmother with an arti. The bride's family also brings gifts, the thali and a ring on a platter and lead a procession to his home. The groom is then escorted to a ganesha temple before he proceeds to the marriage venue

Poovai Arithal: the bride joins the groom in front of her house

Bhagavanam: Kappus or bracelets are tied on the wrists of the couple

Arimna Iduthal or sprouted grains are showered on the couple

Poomanam Iduthal or a ritual where the couple is blessed by touching their wrists, elbows and shoulders with flowers dipped in milk

Saptapathy: The couple circles the sacred fire seven times even as the pujari chants the marriage rites. The elders bless the taali and the Thiru Pootuthal happens. In this, the groom ties the taali around the bride's neck twice and his sister firms the third knot up. The couple exchange garlands three times and take the blessings of the elders.

Isaivu Pidimanam: The fathers of the bride and the groom sign the marriage agreement made by the pujari. The couple is officially married now.

Post-wedding ceremonies:
Thirupootu: The bride is welcomed into her marital home with a simple ritual involving seven cups on a platter filled with fruits, betel leaves, turmeric, sacred ash, rice, salt, tamarid and cotton. While the bride also performs the padapuja by washing her mother-in-law's feet.

Kalyanavevu and Mamavevu: Bride is given gifts by her maternal uncle

Manavarai: The couple is blessed and the bride is initiated into her marital duties

The turmeric bath: The ritualistic oil and turmeric bath for the couple

Kulam Vazhum Pillai: Household duties are handed over the bride in a ritual involving a small silver statue of a baby in a waterpot and the adorning the bride with a bangle by the groom's mother

Thumbu Kattudal: Tying of the matrimonial thread on the bride and she is fed with food from her mother's house. Visiting relatives eat fruit and milk and they also hand over their gifts to the couple

Kaichi Uttrrudal: The feast is hosted by the bride's family in honour of her marital family. After all the functions are over, the bride's father removes the arasanikkal and takes the sprouts covered in a silk cloth to a nearby tank or lake and immerses them. This ritual is performed to the sound of a conch and marks the end of the traditional Chettiar wedding.